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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, DOCTORIZE FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 018.07.154.55 *** DOCTORIZE has posted an AUDIO MESSAGE. If you wish to listen, type LISTEN01. <USER> LISTEN01 AUDIO MESSAGE PLAYING... <doctorize> This is the line for Dr. Daniel Dickens. If you'd like to leave a message, please do so here. I'll try to get back to you as soon as possible! | ||||
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See you tomorrow, then.
[And he does, indeed, show up the following day - feeling quite a bit more uneasy than he anticipated. What IS the big deal? He's gotten more or less used to his talks with Hawkeye, hasn't he?
... Is it just because it's an actual specialist this time? Is he afraid of exposing himself to someone new, or of exposing himself to someone who is even more apt to point out what exactly is wrong with him?
After talking to the clerk, Marco waits, tapping his foot despite his best attempts to look calm.]
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Ah, there you are Marco! I was almost afraid you weren't going to make it--here, follow me, my office is just down the hall.
[And when they get there, Marco will see that it's a rather nice set-up. There's Danny's desk and some medical-looking cabinets in the back, but you're being directed to a soft chair to sit in by a bookcase (mostly empty save for the few scavenged, threadbare books he acquired from poking around here) while Danny walks over to where he has an old kettle sitting.]
Can I get you anything to drink? Water, coffee, tea...?
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[He isn't really thirsty, but it's nice to have something to disguise any potential fidgeting with.
... The chair is nice, too. That's all he can really focus on for the moment.]
So... Erm... You get many clients yet?
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[Congratulations? Danny hands him a glass of water, before he takes a seat in the chair opposite the one that Marco is sitting in, clipboard balanced on his knee.]
Even so, you don't have to worry, as I will do my best to provide a listening ear and guidance where appropriate. Everything that is said here is confidential, so you're free to talk about anything that you wish to discuss with me, and it won't leave this room. Is that alright?
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[A nervous laugh, and then a nervous sip of water. First customer, huh. What an honour.
He feels oddly queasy.]
That's fine, that's fine, of course. I just... I'm not sure where to begin. Erm--
[Marco remembers something, suddenly - but he isn't sure whether it's a legitimate way to get things going or just an attempt to beat around the bush for a little longer. He takes a piece of paper from his pocket and hands it over to Danny - scrawled on it is the name of a sedative.]
That, ah, that's what Hawkeye prescribed for me. I thought it might-- Hm. Maybe I should have left that for the end. I don't even know if you're going to prescribe me anything, or...
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[Danny takes the piece of paper, making a note of the sedative on his clipboard here before he hands it back.]
Start with whatever you're most comfortable with, or wish to talk about the most here.
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Gonna have to get it out, though.]
Alright.
It's not... a huge problem now, with that medication, but... I hear things. Voices.
[One day, Marco might not feel so self-conscious about something he's always seen as A Definite Sign Of Craziness. Not today.]
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At that, Danny simply nods, as if that's the most normal thing he's ever heard in his life.]
How long has this been going on? Was this happening before you arrived here?
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He idly spins his glass of water in his fingers.]
No. No, I'm fairly sure it wasn't. I think it started after... after a Christmas party here in Ryslig. Two years ago, I think? It, ah, it was one of those parties that went wrong. A lot of people saw or felt things that weren't real. But I... never stopped, I suppose. And then I started losing track of... You know. Of what was real or not.
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[Danny makes a note of that here on his clipboard before he continues.]
I understand if the details are hard to talk about, or even remember in their entirety given that this happened two years ago, but can you tell me what exactly happened at this party, and what you remember experiencing in more detail? Perhaps there's a key within what you saw and heard during that event that explains why you're still hearing these voices now.
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[He remembers well enough - or at least as well as he remembers most things. It's just...]
It... is a little personal. I figure that's why it stuck, anyway. But... But I realise that means I should talk about it, too.
I think... I felt like I was in Hell. There was fire all around me... [He slowly nods.] I thought the Devil had finally come to give me my just desserts.
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Years before I came to Ryslig, I... killed my father. In self-defense. He was a vampire, he lost control, he... [He never feels comfortable justifying it. It's much easier to speak of what he sees as damning.] I destroyed all the evidence and inherited his business.
[He breathes out like he's only just remembering to do so.] And then I was brought here and I turned into something that-- that needs to kill with my bare hands to keep myself going. I convinced myself I was... I was being punished. Or tested. Maybe both.
Hawkeye said I, uh, showed signs of post-traumatic stress. I-I suppose I get where that comes from.
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He may be right about that, but... [Danny taps his pen against his clipboard for a moment, thinking before he speaks again.]
Marco, if you killed your father in self-defense, then surely that would make it a justifiable homicide, wouldn't it? At least, it would be considered as such in a court of law for most places, even with setting vampirism aside.
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[The way he says that, you might assume he's just tired of thinking about it. Truth be told, this point of view rubbed him wrong the very first time someone brought it up.]
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Ah, I suppose it doesn't change the fact that you took a life, does it? Regardless of whether or not one could consider it justified... I apologize if it sounded like your concern for committing such an act wasn't valid.
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[Marco gulps down some more water, takes a deep breath.]
S-Sorry. I've had this discussion before.
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[Danny considers something.]
Well, why don't we talk about something else for a moment? Tell me about your interests, or any hobbies you have that are enjoying to take part in.
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Uh... Well, I like... computers. Programming and developing and whatnot. I suppose it's related to... to my job, but I do really enjoy it.
[A pause.]
It's had its ups and downs, but I think computers might be my favourite hobby. That feels right.
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[Ok well he didn't mean to bring this back to his dad but]
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Well that's good, having a hobby from home that you can appreciate and work with here too.
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And... If you think about it, it's pretty lucky, too. Ordinarily, a world with this general level of technological advancement might not have personal computers.
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[Danny makes a note of something here, before he speaks again.]
Is there anything else you enjoy doing here? Or anything in general that makes you happy or feel more at ease?
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[It takes him a little bit. It's... genuinely, strangely hard to come up with an answer.]
I like... swimming.
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