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Daniel "Danny" Dickens ([personal profile] doctorize) wrote2021-02-06 09:07 pm

inbox ([community profile] ryslig)

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peccatore: (ok now i close my hand over the tie righ)

<marco>

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-09 02:53 pm (UTC)(link)
That's very kind of you to say.

Okay, knowing you're settled in certainly makes me more comfortable.
Is tomorrow afternoon good?
peccatore: (EVERYTHING IS FINE)

> action

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-10 01:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks.

See you tomorrow, then.


[And he does, indeed, show up the following day - feeling quite a bit more uneasy than he anticipated. What IS the big deal? He's gotten more or less used to his talks with Hawkeye, hasn't he?

... Is it just because it's an actual specialist this time? Is he afraid of exposing himself to someone new, or of exposing himself to someone who is even more apt to point out what exactly is wrong with him?

After talking to the clerk, Marco waits, tapping his foot despite his best attempts to look calm.]
peccatore: (who are you)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-12 01:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Uh, water's fine. Thanks.

[He isn't really thirsty, but it's nice to have something to disguise any potential fidgeting with.

... The chair is nice, too. That's all he can really focus on for the moment.]


So... Erm... You get many clients yet?
peccatore: (ok now i close my hand over the tie righ)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-13 01:35 pm (UTC)(link)
Ah.

[A nervous laugh, and then a nervous sip of water. First customer, huh. What an honour.

He feels oddly queasy.]


That's fine, that's fine, of course. I just... I'm not sure where to begin. Erm--

[Marco remembers something, suddenly - but he isn't sure whether it's a legitimate way to get things going or just an attempt to beat around the bush for a little longer. He takes a piece of paper from his pocket and hands it over to Danny - scrawled on it is the name of a sedative.]

That, ah, that's what Hawkeye prescribed for me. I thought it might-- Hm. Maybe I should have left that for the end. I don't even know if you're going to prescribe me anything, or...
peccatore: (panes ME was a mistake)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-15 12:59 pm (UTC)(link)
[He takes a deep breath. It's reassuring that Danny is a professional, even if it doesn't do much for how nervous he feels.

Gonna have to get it out, though.]


Alright.

It's not... a huge problem now, with that medication, but... I hear things. Voices.

[One day, Marco might not feel so self-conscious about something he's always seen as A Definite Sign Of Craziness. Not today.]
peccatore: (we may have much... to fear)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-17 02:25 pm (UTC)(link)
[At least he's thought of the answer to that question by now. A few months ago, he might have been too unsure.

He idly spins his glass of water in his fingers.]


No. No, I'm fairly sure it wasn't. I think it started after... after a Christmas party here in Ryslig. Two years ago, I think? It, ah, it was one of those parties that went wrong. A lot of people saw or felt things that weren't real. But I... never stopped, I suppose. And then I started losing track of... You know. Of what was real or not.
peccatore: (ok now i close my hand over the tie righ)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-20 03:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Ah...

[He remembers well enough - or at least as well as he remembers most things. It's just...]

It... is a little personal. I figure that's why it stuck, anyway. But... But I realise that means I should talk about it, too.

I think... I felt like I was in Hell. There was fire all around me... [He slowly nods.] I thought the Devil had finally come to give me my just desserts.
peccatore: (panes ME was a mistake)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-23 11:59 am (UTC)(link)
[Marco inhales. The look in his eyes, if one were particularly adept at reading it, is that of someone who is so very, very tired of dwelling on something but just can't quite move on.]

Years before I came to Ryslig, I... killed my father. In self-defense. He was a vampire, he lost control, he... [He never feels comfortable justifying it. It's much easier to speak of what he sees as damning.] I destroyed all the evidence and inherited his business.

[He breathes out like he's only just remembering to do so.] And then I was brought here and I turned into something that-- that needs to kill with my bare hands to keep myself going. I convinced myself I was... I was being punished. Or tested. Maybe both.

Hawkeye said I, uh, showed signs of post-traumatic stress. I-I suppose I get where that comes from.
peccatore: (ok now i close my hand over the tie righ)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-25 04:04 pm (UTC)(link)
That-- That's not the point.

[The way he says that, you might assume he's just tired of thinking about it. Truth be told, this point of view rubbed him wrong the very first time someone brought it up.]
peccatore: (panes ME was a mistake)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-26 01:33 pm (UTC)(link)
... Thank you for understanding.

[Marco gulps down some more water, takes a deep breath.]

S-Sorry. I've had this discussion before.
peccatore: (who are you)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-04-30 04:20 pm (UTC)(link)
[That's... a really unexpected turn, actually. It sort of takes Marco a couple of seconds to process the question.]

Uh... Well, I like... computers. Programming and developing and whatnot. I suppose it's related to... to my job, but I do really enjoy it.

[A pause.]

It's had its ups and downs, but I think computers might be my favourite hobby. That feels right.
peccatore: (ok now i close my hand over the tie righ)

[personal profile] peccatore 2018-05-03 02:13 pm (UTC)(link)
I've liked computers since I was a kid. My father's company... That's, uh, that's what it dealt in. Computers and computer software.

[Ok well he didn't mean to bring this back to his dad but]

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